It's a Wonderful Life, In India It Is!
by MinecraftMan1
Summary: A collection of one-shot's inspired by Crackpot's 'Play it again, Samson' fic. Every chapter is a one-shot inspired by song lyrics of the adventures of me and Raj back in India. You can also message song lyrics to me and I will add them and credit you.
1. A Nightmare

I decided to write a multi-chapter story a few night agos. Each chapter is a one-shot with me and Raj back in India. Each one-shot is based off song lyrics (Kinda like Crackpot's 'Play it again, Samson' fic. But this will have more chapters), no matter how the crazy the storyline may be. These are the opening chapter's song lyrics.

_Stay up till four in the mornin'_

_And the tears are pourin'_

_Gwen Stefani - Four in the morning_

Without further ado, here is the first one-shot...

**A nightmare**

Raj stood there, frightened. He couldn't move, for he had the gut feeling that a lion was nearby.

And he was right as well. The only direction Raj was looking at was at clumps of ragweed, where he knew there was a lion hiding in the bushes. He had specifically heard a lion's growl.

Now, Raj stood there. One false move in BINGO! You have a coffin in Africa, where your remains are happily chewed by foraging hyena's and lions. Your right hand could be in Libya, and your left in...errrr...let's say Rwanda.

Raj was crying big tears. Not a good idea for that. One of them plopped on a rock with a small noise...

...enough to make the lion pounce. Which it did.

Before Raj had time to scream, he was on his back with two forepaw's of the lion closing like vice's on his chest. Raj couldn't escape a lion. The lion roared, spraying saliva droplet's all over Raj's face.

This is it, Raj thought, this is my demise. Please let it be painless and quick.

The lion raised his front paw and with a mighty swing...

**POOF!**

'AAAAAAGHHHHHHHH!' Raj screamed, throwing his head up from his pillow and breathing fast and heavily. He was sweating like mad.

Well, he thought it was sweat. And he hoped it probably was.

Raj examined himself. Not a single mark on his body. It was just a dream!

But a bad dream it was...

'I can't go back to sleep otherwise more bad animals are going to attaaacckkkkk me...' Raj sobbed. 'WAAAAAAAAAAAA!' he snuffled, wiping his tears on his already sweaty arm.

Raj looked around for safety. A glance onto the digital clock showed the time of 4:00am. There was nothing in the room to save him from bad dreams, except one.

Which was me snoring my head off and mumbling 'Derp, derp, derp in the jungle.'

Raj crept off the bed and millimetre by miillimetre, hoping a random lion, tiger, or Lazlo would pounce out from under his bed, he made it to mine.

'Deeeerrrrrrrpppp!'

Raj shook my shoulder. 'Wake up!'

'Would you like fries with that?' I sleeptalked.

'WAKE UP!' Raj yelled, shaking my shoulder. This time he was successful. I snorted a few times and said 'Whaaaaa, who said that?'

'It's me!' Raj said.

'Oh man, I had the BEST dream in the entire road. I was in a jungle, and there were lots of people derping with their best derp faces, and then I went to a McDonalds...' I ranted.

'I don't care for your dreams...I' Raj began, until he saw my best Puss In Boot's face. 'Alright, your dream was magnificant.' Raj said flatly.

'Yay!' I celebrated.

'The point is, I had a...' Raj began, but was cut-off by me.

'Nightmare about you being in Africa and then a lion killed you?' I said.

'How did you know?' Raj asked suspiciously.

'Telepathic waves.' I said, until Raj was looking at me a little annoyed. 'Alright, it was a wild guess. But at the least I know about your nightm...' I was cut off. Raj was crying louder.

'WAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!' Raj sobbed, throwing his body over my midriff. I rubbed his head. 'Good boy Raj. Your doing the right thing. I can protect you from scary dreams...Unlike last time...'

***cut to a dream that happened a week before***

'AGHHHHHHH!' I yelled. 'SPIDER!'

It was a daddy-long-legs.

***dream ends***

'Man that was a shocker of a dream!' I said. 'Alright Raj, you can sleep with me. Just go on the other side of the bed.'

Raj seemed happy. Not that you could see it in the dark. Raj got up on the bed and jumped over onto the other side. As soon as he got under the blankets he threw an arm and a trunk over my shoulder and hugged me tight. And snored. I couldn't forget the snoring.

'Thank you, dude.' were his final words before the Sandman took him to Sleepyland and a dream of bunnies.

_Author's notes, comment's and other stuff...: This is the first chapter of one-shot's inspired by song lyrics...inspired by a Crackpot fanfic...I'll have more._


	2. Don't Leave Me!

Yes, I've already updated this fic! I know I've never created a story with over 5 chapters but this will have HEAPS! Blah blah blah, let's come to the second batch of lyrics that this chapter was inspired by...

_I don't know what I do if I ever lost you..._

_And all the loneliness I will go through..._

_Vanessa Hudgens - Don't Leave_

And welcome to our next chapter guys!

**DON'T LEAVE ME!**

'NOOOOOOOOO!' Raj yelled, sobbing like a little girl, running at full speed down the hall, skidding around the corners before taking a long dive, grasping onto my leg as I'm about to walk out the door. 'PLEASE! DON'T LEAVE! I CAN'T BEAR TO BE ALONE!'

Raj took me by surprise. Just as I was about to step outside I felt a tugging by my ankles. I had looked down to see a sad-eyed elephant wiggling's its mouth, getting ready to cry.

'WHAT WILL I DO WITHOUT YOU!' Raj screamed, wiping his eyes on my leg. I sighed and wiped the tears off my ankle, but Raj just kept them coming. I gave up.

'What?' I asked. 'What do you want?'

'Please! Please don't leave me! I don't want you to leave!' Raj was crying full-on, sniffling at every available moment there was. I tried to shake him off. And I was successful.

'Raj, I'm...' I began

'Don't 'Raj, I'm' me! I just don't want you to leee-heee-heeave!' Raj cried, stuttering the last word.

Raj jumped up onto my back and tried pulling me back. With a flat look on my face, I did a backwards 'Are you scared of a butterfly?' joke and Raj fell down, but it didn't stop him. Raj leapt up again and had me in a headlock, his arm around my throat, his trunk covering my eyes. A big disadvantage.

'AGHHHH! I'M BLINDED!' I yelled and walked straight into the door. 'D'oh! Ah nuts, now where am I?' Desperately, I pulled the trunk off my eyes and Raj fell down. This time, Raj just resorted to hugging my leg and whimpering again.

'Dude, settle down.' I said.

This time Raj followed my command. He got up and dried his eyes. When I whispered into his abnormously large ear, he settled down for good.

'I was going to get the mail...'


	3. A Hot Summer, A Hot Hot Summer

Since one-shots are pretty short-ish, I've decided to create more. I might run out of song lyrics so if I do I'll just use my mind to create more (without the lyrics). Without further, are any nearer, ado, comes our third bunch of lyrics,

_I keep it compose..._

_Just wanna rip off my clothes..._

_Monrose - Hot Summer_

Let's get ready to READOOOOOOO!

**What is this? The Sun?**

'Ohhhhhhhhhhh...' Raj moaned, sizzling his body in the hot, hot sun. It was impossible to measure the temperature. My thermomater's top had popped and mercury had spilled out. Musta been like a town in Libya in 1922 where the tempo went up to 58 degrees Celsius, the hottest temperature known.

But I was enjoying it. 5 minutes ago, I went on my laptop to check our local temperature, which has been recorded at a skin-blistering 57 degrees. Pretty close to the record, but it breaks all known records in America (56 at Death Valley in 1913). We had already gone through tons of sunscreen.

'Raj, the ONLY cure for this weather is a dip in the lake!' I said smartly. Raj didn't move, he didn't feel like moving. I felt like walking 200 metres to the wave-producing lake nearby. Raj didn't.

'Okay then. I guess I have no choice then but to...drag you there.' I said, grabbed a fibreglass surfboard. With my free hand I grabbed Raj's slack trunk and started dragging him to the lake. As soon as I had got there I tossed him about 10 metres into the water and yelled 'HAVE FUN!' When he submerged he was alive and swimming.

'Oh yes, that's much better!' the happy, cooled down elephant. 'I just have a knack for surfing now!'

Barefoot (I learned to get used to barefoot walking in hot weather.), I ran back to the house and grabbed Raj's smaller surfboard and ran back. I waded into the water but before I had my head in the water I was sprayed by a jet of water. Raj had sucked in some water and gave me a little playful spray.

'Ah, ya wanna muck around?' I said happily. I ran back to the house again and brang a vuvuzela (Great compliments of the World Cup 2010). I dove silently back into the water, using the vuvuzela as a snorkel, until Raj had his back turned (He hadn't noticed me yet) and blew the vuvuzela so hard that a jet of water sprayed out into Raj's face.

'Ahahahahaha!' Raj cried. I splashed him back, and he sprayed me. This went on for a few hours.

That is, until we heard the dinging of a familiar vehicle.

'ICE-CREAM TRUCK!' I yelled.

We got out wearing nothing at all (No shame.) and raced to the ice cream truck as fast as we could. On a day like this, it would be free (No joke, this is real. Such a thing is allowed in our town). But when we got to the ice-cream truck we saw something that you'd see with ice-cream, but not with the truck itself.

The truck had melted.

'Wow' Raj said. 'Just goes to show how literal things have to be on a day like this.'

Me and Raj looked at each other. We fell down laughing like nuts.

_Author's notes, stuff, and randomness: There are more to come. First, dinnertime!_


	4. Unusual Times at Night

Where has the time gone? I've managed to upload the fourth of many chapters in this fic. These chapters take a short time to write, you know, so that's why I posted the first of three one-shot's last night. Lucky that today already has ten hit's for the moment, but absolutely no reviews at all! Why won't anybody review? Before you could get, like, 67 reviews for a good four chapter story. Oh whatever, here's the fourth lyric batch.

_You said tomorrow would be fine_

_And we could watch a place in the sun_

_I didn't know where this was going_

_When you kissed me._

_Lily Allen - Who'd Have Known_

Here's the fourth story (warning, like the last lyric suggests, there is going to be a kiss!).

**Unusual Times at Night**

'Dude?' Raj asked, snuggling closer to me. He had had another bad dream and decided to sleep with me. This time, the dream was about a monster (He said was similar to Sully in Monsters Inc.) that ate him. However, he said it was a brown monster (I asked him if it was a Grue or not).

'Yes?' I replied.

'Well, if it's possible, can...can I sleep with you all the time? So...I can get all the protection I need?' Raj stuttered.

'Oh, that's SUPER fine!' I smiled. 'I can protect you from all the bad dreams. Spiders, monsters, even Grues!'

Raj snuggled in closer.

'Good boy.' I said. Raj wasn't sleeping just yet, but for all I knew he was smiling.

'Well, there's one problem.' I said. 'What's the other bed going to be used for?'

Raj opened his eyes wide. 'I hadn't given that a thought at all.'

'Oh, we can organise something of some sort. I'm good at organisation.' I replied.

I moved over a bit and put my arm around Raj's neck. Happy as a clam we both we're. Everything was perfect. Friends forever and I don't have to worry. Raj rolled over and gave me a peck on the cheek. 'Goodnight.' he said, and fell asleep.

However, I stayed wide awake. I just had the biggest thought in my head. It was an insecurity that had just happened only five seconds ago. I could not have even believed it myself, even if this was a dream of some sort. It was probably a good gesture of some sort, but to me, it felt weird.

Raj had just_ kissed _me.

_Author's random appreciation, stuff, and Grue hunting advice: I warned you there was kissing! At least the tongue and lips are kept out of it, but next chapter is hopefully updated sooner. P.S. Grue's cannot be killed. Haha!_


	5. Another Hot Summer's Day

Yes...I'm back. There might only be 2174 words, but this fic ain't stoppin'! While I've been here, I've been thinking up new lyrics and idea's, and while you've been here, you've been reading this. So with further ado...

...

...

...

...

...I did say further ado, didn't I? What I meant is without FURTHER ado (Vindication!). Here's lyric number 5!

_So I got a question;_

_Do you want to have a summer party in my basement?_

_Do I make your heart beat like an 808 drum?_

_Your Love is My Drug - Ke$ha_

If you read between the lines (or on them, in between the lines are just white), you can figure out the setting. So, this is the fifth batch of lyrics. Blah blah blah SCROLL DOWN YOU FOOL! Don't read this.

**Another Hot Summer's Day**

'Hey slacky-trunks!' I called out to the elephant fanning himself profusely on the end of the table in a desperate effort to keep himself cool and refreshed. 'Can ya pass me another one of them can's of Coke?'

Raj's arm reached out, grasped a can and slid it across the table, the ring pull skimming a little on the point of the wall at the other end of the table. The point was especially designed to crack open ring pulls, and for about the twenty-seventh time today (mind you, it's only 11:00am!), the device did its' job. It wasn't pretty long before I was guzzling down a nice cool soft drink.

'Dude, I appreciate the new nickname you've been callin' me for the past two hours because it does describe me very well enough.' Raj moaned. 'By the way, we're outta can's.'

'Drat! I'll have to go to the milkbar again!' I groaned.

I got up and patted Raj on the head.

'Seeya in about ten minutes slacky-trunks.' I smiled. Raj smiled because of his hot summer day nickname.

**About nine minutes and fifty-nine seconds later...**

'Your back early.' Raj said, who was on a recliner chair with an umbrella on it. 'Toss me one couldja.'

I can't complain. It's too hot to even walk around. I threw him a can of Sprite.

Raj noticed my back was peeling away.

'What happened to your back?' Raj asked.

'That darn car seat.' I grumbled. 'About five million degrees.'

We gulped down soft drinks for the next few hours. Then, I had an idea.

'Y'know, them fans in the house don't actually cool down the house much.' I said. Raj cocked his head, giving me the idea he needed to know more. 'So I was thinking, maybe we can use your basement as a fan storage, and we can turn them on and get a REALLY COOL BREEZE!'

Raj jumped up. 'You're RIGHT!'

'I'll be in the basement in 15 minutes with all the fans and one of them power strips!'

**About 15 minutes and one second later...**

'You're a bit late...' Raj said.

My arms were laden with fans, air conditioners, and a three metre long power strip with heaps of extension cord. I started connecting all the air conditioners, while Raj did business with all the fans.

'Now...get ready...for the COOLEST BREEZE IN DA HOUSE BABEH!' I yelled, flicking every single switch of the house. And the first thing we did was sit there freezing. And we liked it.

'Oh yeah...now this is it...' Raj cooed to himself. 'I can feel myself freezing already...wait a minute. I'M TOO COLD! NEED HOT AIR! NOW! AGHHHHHHH!'

Raj suddenly jumped up and, not even FIVE seconds into a nice cool breeze, he rushed out of the basement screaming 'I NEED TO GET HOT!'. But as soon as Raj stepped outside again, he yelled 'TOO HOT, I NEED A COOL BREEZE!'

Then, Raj came back and yelled 'AGHHHHH! COLD AIR! I NEED HOT AIR...' and ran back out and...you guessed it, he's been doing it for five hours...

'This is gonna be a long day.' I muttered, getting under a bearskin blanket.

_Author's presents, chicken dinner, and ponderings: I'm pondering over more lyrics...I might be a while, this is the longest story in chapter's I've created at the moments. (No presents or chicken for you)_


	6. New Years Eve Wishes

Luckily the weekend's upon us! I should make a few extra chapters barring any known unforseen circumstances, like shopping, and practising stuff, all the stuff, you know. Without any...and better be any, further ado, I present to you...whatever, just read 'em :D

_Can we pretend that airplane's in the night sky are like shooting stars?_

_I could really use a wish right now (wish right now, wish right now)_

_Airplanes - B.o.B_

And here, presented to you on demand, is the sixth chapter of the story.

**New Years Eve Wishes**

It's 11:40pm, and New Years Eve 2010 is upon us. While Raj's parents are out celebrating at a dinner party to welcome 2010, me and Raj prepared our own celebration.

That is to say, we sit outside and watch the fireworks until they end, then go inside and watch TV for the rest of the night until we fall asleep.

But now, the only things in the night sky are just a mass of moving lights which I could identify as either airplanes or an alien invasion. Good Lord, I hope it's not an alien invasion.

'You got any resolutions?' I asked the pachyderm.

Raj put one finger on his chin and thought hard. 'Well, I was thinking of maybe...trying out for a sport or recreational game.'

'Kinda like a game of downball.' I said to myself. Raj stared at me. 'Do you have a resolution?'

'Well, let's see.' I said, thinking hard. 'I was kinda thinking of trying to break a world record.'

'Like?' Raj asked.

'Oh, I dunno, maybe...I'm not sure.' I said.

'Oh, okay. You don't really need have to have a resolution of some sort.' Raj replied back.

We both layed our heads into dew-covered grass, looking up into thick clouds and faint lights from a hopeful non-alien invasion of some sort. Of course, it wasn't an invasion. It was lot's of airplanes, probably biplanes with big, annoying banners saying things like 'HAPPY NEW YEAR' and 'HAPPY NEW YEARS DAY'

'The wackiest resolutions are the first things that come to mind' I said.

'Yeah, like...THINK OF A RESOLUTION!' Raj said, yelling the last part.

'TURTLE KISSING!'

Raj looked at me and started laughing until tears came down his face. 'That statement _definitely_ is true now!'

'Y'know, I have an idea. How about we make some wishes on those airplanes?' I said.

'Oh, like you do with a shooting star?' Raj replied, cocking his head.

'Well, we'll have to wait for one plane first.' I said.

**A few minutes later...at around 11:59pm.**

A faint light rushed across the sky, silently puffing out through a cloud and becoming more detailed. A big airplane was flying north up to either Nepal, Russia, or hopefully changing direction to Kyrygystan.

'Your wish.' I said to Raj.

Raj thought hard. 'I wish we would never leave each other.'

'Dawwwwwwwww.' I said and hugged Raj, watching as the loud pops of colourful fireworks gracefully arced across the black dome in the sky, spraying down the colours of the 'bow.

_Author's wishes, discoveries, and weekend plans: For my first wish, I hope you liked this chapter. For my second wish, REVIEW PLEASE, I don't care if it's an anonymous review, and for my third wish, PM/review me some song lyrics on my account and, if they're good, I'll use them in future chapters. Have fun LOL!_


	7. Late Night, City Lights

Chapter seven's up folks! Here is lucky seven in lyrics!

_I've got a car_

_I've got a big black shiny car_

_Maybe tonight we could go for a ride_

_Drive - Shannon Noll_

The lyrics from 2003's Australian Idol runner-up have inspired me. Shannon (who is a MAN) is a brilliant singer. Here's the story...

**Late Night, City Lights, That's What's Right**

'Why won't that darn radio kick in?' I furiously yelled, twiddling the dials and knobs of the not-working radio. It had cut out on me for the ninetieth time already. I had parked in a car park.

'Well, other than the radio kicking out, it's a pretty good night.' Raj said. 'We ARE going to be seeing 'Percy Jackson and the Lightning Thief', aren't we?'

'Yeah, that's not for an hour, and this radio won't work' I said, twiddling the volume.

'It's a cinema, not a drive-in, you know.' Raj reminded me.

'I know THAT.' I said. 'But I want to listen to my CD. Remember the last time the radio went crazy?'

***flashback***

Me and Raj were in the two front seats of the car listening to 'What is Love?' by Haddaway, moving our heads to the lyrics.

'_What is love?_

_Baby don't hurt me,_

_Don't hurt me no more_

_What is love...'_

And then the radio switched songs. We stopped moving our heads and looked at the radio.

_'Never gonna give you up_

_Never gonna let you down...'_

**'AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!' ** we screamed.

***end flashback***

'That was quite a humorous bit of fun.' Raj said.

**'FUN? I WANTED TO LISTEN TO HADDAWAY AND IT CHANGED TO RICK ASTLEY!' **I said.

Raj ignored my rant. 'Well, to me it was fun.'

'Well, why did you scream?' I asked.

I had Raj there. 'Alright, it wasn't fun.'

All of a sudden, static kicked in on the radio. A very loud bit of static, like fingernails clawing down the blackboard making a terribly shocking screeching noise. And then, came something we didn't want to hear.

_'Never gonna give you up_

_Never gonna let you down...'_

**'AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!' ** we screamed. 

_Author's chit-chat, Runescape review and Rick Astley review: I'll be coming up with a few more chapters in the hopefully near future. P.S. Runescape sucks and so does Rick Astley!_


	8. You Just Lost The Game! Oh, Wrong Title

And whaddaya know, I ALREADY HAVE MY EIGHTH CHAPTER UP! Note that I don't actually know some of these song lyrics, I just search them up for some inspiration (LOL). Without any further ado...here is the eighth...

**YOU JUST LOST THE GAME**

What the heck? Oh well, here's that batch of lyrics again.

_Thunderbolt and lightning_

_Very very frightening me_

_Bohemian Polka - Weird Al Yankovic_

Updating this is hard work! Now, where were we? Oh yes, back to the story again!

(Note. When BLAAAARRRGGHHH and all that is said, it is just onomatopoeia for the Shoop-Da-Woop, or a laser fire.)

**Thunder. It Scares Elephants.**

T'was a stormy night in our town. A low pressure system brang in water from the Indian Ocean and now it's turning our dry crops into drowned crops. While I stood behind the closed window, the window covered in droplet's of transparent liquid crystals, known as dihydrogen monoxide drops...

What?

Alright then, H2O drops.

WHAT?

Fine, raindrops.

Where was I? Oh yes, it was raining. I said to myself, times are great. If that elephant would get off my back and stop crying every time a storm was coming. Which is happening. Right. Now.

Poor Raj is hugging me tight, whimpering. He hates thunderstorms. He hates it more than bugs (Hey, he likes ELEBUG!) and swimming (Hey, he likes SWIMMING NOW!) combined from the times before he used to fear them for good. One tiiiiiiiiiny little flash of lightning and BOOM! He's crying and hugging me, or hopefully a teddy bear, a pillow, or your mother. Or if he's unlucky, either a Grue, a Boogeyman, or a deadly internet meme (mind you, that happens to ME!)

'Um,' Raj quietly whimpered. 'Don't you HATE all this lightning and thunder? It SCARES me. Waaaaaaah!'

'What? No,' I replied. 'The only things I'm afraid of are spiders. Seriously, a daddy-long-whatever you call it scares the daylights out of me. That's also the only reason I fear Halloween.'

'What about the time when Doctor Octogonapus comes out of unexpected places and Shoops you?' Raj asked.

'That's a different story.' I said.

***flashback***

I had just gone to the mailbox and found a letter.

'Hey, it's a letter from Domino's!' I said excitedly. I ripped the letter open and started reading it.

Silence.

'DOCTOR OCTOGONAPUS!' said a man who was flying in the air. 'BLAARRRRGHHHH!'

***second flashback***

I had just got out of the shower and was drying myself off.

Silence.

'DOCTOR OCTOGONAPUS!' said a man, coming in through the window. 'BLARRRGHHHHH!'

***third flashback***

The sink was clogged up and I was checking what was in it.

'What the heck is in there?' I asked myself. Then...

'DOCTOR OCTOGONAPUS!' said you-know-who popping out of the sink. 'BLL...' This time, I began beating him up.

'OH GOD, OH MY GOD!' I said, punching Doctor Octogonapus back into the sink. This time, the tables turned and I lasered him. 'BLLARRRGHHHH!'

'Last time I see you!' I said. Then, someone tapped my shoulder. It was Doctor Octogonapus...again!

'What?' I said. 'Then, how? What? Um?'

'Stunt guy.' Doctor Octogonapus said. 'BLLLARRRRGHHH!

***end all flashbacks***

'...and I'm also afraid of getting shocked by an electric buzzer. It scares me like snakes in a nut can, not that I like nuts.' I said. 'Just remember Clown College.'

***flashback***

It was that 'Homie The Clown' Simpsons episode. Krusty was giving out sheepskins to the graduates. Next in line was a happy guy. Krusty had an electric buzzer on.

'This is the happiest day of my li...GYAAAAHHH!' the man said. When he shook Krusty's hand, he got shocked. Next was Homer. He snatched the sheepskin away from Krusty.

'GOTCHA! No electric shock for ME!' Homer said happily, and ran off laughing. However, Krusty gave chase and tackled Homer, giving him numerous electric buzzes. This is usually where the ad comes on.

Not in this life. I'm next in line.

'That fat shmuck better have learned a lesson.' Krusty muttered. I got the sheepskin. Krusty was about to shake my hand but I pulled it away.

'If you give electric shocks, I give SHOOPS!' I yelled. 'BLAARRGHH...'

***end flashback***

'But you didn't get an electric shock then.' Raj said.

'Yeah? I fear them. That's why I look at hands before I handshake. If I see a buzzer, that person gets my Shoop.' I said.

'And _where on Earth_ did you get Shoop powers?' Raj suspiciously asked.

'The same way people get stigmata. A mystery.' I replied.

As soon as I had finished my sentence, a flash of light illuminated the already dark room. In a split second, you could see the whole room in white. The beds, the posters, the dartboard (magnetic) and Raj. Soon after, the room was dark and a loud bang was heard. It was thunder and lightning. A microsecond later, Raj was screaming. Again.

'AAAAHHHHH! _Waahaahaa!_' he shrieked, suddenly making a fast Usain Bolt like scramble up to the top of my head. Now his teeth were chattering, his breath was coming in fast gulps, and I could hear his heartbeat going at a thousand miles per hour. As well as this, his eyes were shut tight. And he had tears streaming down his face, bigger than you thumbnail, falling on my face, which was good enough to drown me.

'Raj, I appreciate you chosing me to go near in case of scary things but could you just please get off my head?'

_Authors stigmata findings, profile updates, and stigmata cures: I now have a journal on my profile! The journal displays my last five entries, and things like new fics and how I'm going are entered. P.S. Stigmata is incurable, which are just so weird, because the wounds represent what Christ got when he was nailed to the cross. Whatever the case is, I have a journal, thank you._


	9. Colourful Cumquats

Chapter nine...right on timeeeeee, this poem sucks so I'm gonna stop singing ittttttt! Now. Okay, the ninth chapter is like, up now. Plus. I'd like to announce that I have a DEVIANTART ACCOUNT! Sucka's beware! I have great art to be appreciated, especially The Illustrious Crackpot, whom is my friend on DevArt now...hey, what am I talking about? I have to write this chapter!

_Black, white, green, red_

_Can I invite my friend to bed?_

_Pink, brown, yellow, orange and blue_

_I love you._

_All Together Now - The Beatles_

Yet again another night/bedtime related story has been written...AGHHHH! Just start the story!

**Colourful Cumquats**

It's bedtime again and Raj is sleeping with me. Today, I made some sort of an attempted dreamcatcher that 'supposedly' catches bad dreams and let's all the good ones come through. I mean, how does that work? Does the dreamcatcher act like a spiderweb that entangles bad dreams in sticky strings? Yet all the good ones can pass through with no problem. I mean, that's just w...Oh, never mind, it was Raj's idea to make one. The dreamcatcher is rainbow coloured.

Whatever, we're in bed.

Still awake.

While I happily close my eyes and try to sleep even though I'm really just wishing to sleep, because it takes me up to 4 hours to go to sleep. Which sucks because I want to go to sleep, but it takes me a while. So that's why I spend the time munching away on food's that won't spread crumbs. For instance, I'm munching on caramelquats** (*)**, which I made for dessert that night, which is a cumquat covered in caramel. Mainly, they were just a dessert made for me, because I was hungry.

'I'm hungry. I'm gonna go get a midnight snack.' Raj mumbled and moved around, trying to get out of bed.

I stop, mid-bite into a caramelquat, open my eyes and look to my left. Raj is standing by the bed, stretching a bit. I grab his shoulder with my left arm and pull out a few caramelquats with my right hand from under the blanket. 'You don't need to go to the kitchen. I have some dessert here.' I say, holding up the delicious desert. 'Have a try of these.'

Raj turned around and looked, but a dim light made it hard to focus on my hand, even when it was only mere inches from Raj's eyes. Raj, unfortunately, couldn't see very well in the dark and missed the caramelquats. He felt something else.

'Hmmmm' Raj said. 'Is this a big, knobby breadfruit?'

Unfortunately, no. Raj has just been caressing a crumpled up piece of paper that randomly appeared out of nowhere on the bed. 'No Raj, that's just paper.' I said a little impatiently. I can see just a bit, and Raj's hand is moving about, patting objects like pillows, sheets, blankets, and my chest, in an effort to find my hand.

Fortunately, Raj eventually found my arm and went up, and finally found the two round, sticky desserts in my hand. He plucked one delicately with two fingers and sniffed at it, making what seemed to be a pleasant face. He must have noticed the caramel smell. He put the whole thing in his mouth and chewed. Now he was really happy.

With his mouth full, Raj commented what seemed to be in 'food-in-mouth' language. 'Oh man, this food is delicious! What is it?'

As he picked the other caramelquat up from my hand and bit into it, I looked up. 'Those, Raj, are a yummy desert I created a few hours ago called caramelquats, or longer, a cumquat dipped in melted caramel and left to cool.' I remarked, as Raj shoved the rest of the caramelquat into his mouth and drooled, looking at me for more.

'I have six more caramelquats. We can share them.' I said, pulling out the remaining desserts. I looked at them. There was just something I could add to them to make them a little...well, you know, exciting...I suppose. I know!

'Raj, do you have the food coloring in this room, plus a clean syringe?' I asked.

Raj's eyes opened wide. 'I do have the food coloring and that syringe. The syringe gets washed every five hours.' he remarked.

'Could you get them?' I said, thinking of the final product for these caramelquats. 'I have a great idea.'

On the side drawer, I keep a torch. I pick it up and handed it to Raj, who flicked it on the make the room luminous. In a drawer nearby were six bottles of different colours of food colouring. In the drawer below was some science equipment I keep for some fun activities. Inside was the syringe we needed. Raj opened both drawer's and got out the supplies we needed (careful not to prick himself with the syringe) and headed to the bed.

'Here's the supplies.' Raj said, handing them over.

Now my plan is about to begin. I open the bottle of red food colouring and, using the syringe, collect ten millilitres of food colouring. Then, I pick out a caramelquat and, carefully, inject spots of the caramel on the caramelquat red, which spreads out to make some large dots. Before long, the whole caramelquat that has been picked out is a shiny red colour.

I pick out another one and get the white food colouring. I inject the second caramelquat with the food colouring, turning it white as the heavens above on a cloudy afternoon. The third caramelquat is injected with yellow food colouring. The fourth turns green, the fifth purple and the sixth blue.

Beside the drawer is a small glass of water. I take out the plunger and wash the syringe in the clean water, until all the food colouring and possible bacterial colonies are out of the glass. I signal to Raj to put the food colouring and the syringe back in their respective drawers, which he does. Then he gets back into bed.

'There we are!' I exclaimed, using the torch to show Raj the caramelquats for the first time. 'Coloured caramelquats!'

Raj silently laughs to himself. 'You always come up with idea's to make the world colourful.' he says, picking out the yellow caramelquat and chewing on it.

_Author's DeviantArt account, school holiday mood and other random things: One thing is to say, I have been constantly posting art on my DeviantArt account. You should check it out by just going to my CampLazloRocks homepage and clicking the website link. Secondly, I am pretty happy since the school holiday period has arrived. Plus, there's nothing else to say._

**(*) Caramelquats are a recipe I created as some art on my DeviantArt account. Please see gallery on how to make them (It's like caramel apples, but using cumquats)**


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